If I Go Now

If I go now

There’ll be

No more

Wondering if I did the right thing

No more

Wishing I’d been a better mother

No more

Money worries

and what will we do when we can’t live here any more.

No more

Wishing I didn’t have to work so hard

While trying to find ways to work harder.

No more

Being a bad friend,

Not making the effort.

No more

Not taking good enough care of the new little boys.

There will be

Sleep, eternal sleep.

If I go now,

There’ll be no more

Memories

Laughs with my children

Sitting by the ocean

Laughing with my friends

Cuddling the little boys.

If I go now

I couldn’t forgive myself.

2 thoughts on “If I Go Now

  1. Bessie says:

    We have never met, but I’ve followed your blog for a few years now because I just LOVE your poetry. It really affects me.
    If you went now, I would be sad. I would miss you and your words.

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